That misspelled slip on an instant message chat says it all.
So many managers “hear to talk.”
They listen to find places they can interrupt, contradict, assert power, make a correction or effortlessly start talking on their own.
Take the time to actually listen. So the next time you “hear to talk” you really are there.
On the Flipside
The most effective managers do the opposite.
They “talk to hear.”
Spend time asking questions and move the conversation to learn what the person talking has to say. That is the benefit of working with a team - getting each person’s unique contribution.
I heard a great anecdote from Ed Brodow that sums up the importance, and power, of listening.
A women in England went on separate dates with two very famous people who had very different personalities, William Gladstone and Benjamin Disraeli.
Asked about her evening with Gladstone she said,
“he took me to the symphony and by the end of the night I felt like I was with the most sophisticated and smartest man in the world.”
And how about your evening with Disraeli? her friends asked.
“He took me to the opera. By the end of the night I felt like I was the most sophisticated and smartest woman in the world.”
Gladstone spent the evening talking about himself.
Disraeli spent his evening listening to her. Disraeli made her feel great.
